My work

Here is one I'm turning in to a competition at my school:

The Child's Legend

The battle raged around the boy,
Def to the rage, blind to the pain,
His sword no more a toy;
Nothing to lose, nothing to gain.

Orphaned when he was born,
Life unwanted, life abandoned,
Family gone, heart long torn,
Anger, rage that none can fathom.

Death looming so close by,
The boy fights to save the day,
Oily dark clouds cover the sky,
Men lost to the violent fray.

Rain pelts flesh and armor,
Wet blood stains the boy’s clothes,
Up from the chains looks the martyr,
Mud coats the deadly foes.

Boy sees the hero from the past,
Martyr looks to see the child,
Dark warrior closes fast,
Boy’s attacks raging, swings wild.

Martyr shouts at bravery,
Child reclaims confidence,
Warrior calls in cavalry,
Warrior’s death unknown since.

Child draws close to hero,
Sword outstretched,
Boy falls endlessly,
Spear through chest.

Martyr weeps, child lost,
Sorrow to sadness to rage,
Hero’s tears fall to the new frost,
Strength enough, broken chains.

Hero, martyr no more,
Takes up fallen child’s sword,
Fights for bravery, fights a war,
Fights with many, fights for Lord,

Lost boy gives hero strength,
Strength enough to win the day,
Fighting through enemy ranks,
Hero enters the fray.

Many fall to Hero’s blade,
Many more turn to run,
Fury unleashed, anger unchained,
Hero stands in reborn sun.

Terror fills evil hearts,
Hero moves with deadly grace,
Dark ranks turn and part,
Dark Lord enters in pace.

Beautiful battle ensues,
A dangerous dance of death,
Fighting fast, fighting true,
Fighting to prevent the end.

Hero comes in fast,
Dark Lord drops his blade,
War ended with a single strike,
Child’s noble sacrifice saved.

Fact to legend to myth,
Child lives on,
Blade lost in history’s mist,
Story told by Hero anon.


More to come ...

is it the same one you entered in last year? I think I am entering in it to, but for a story, and possibly some of my artworks

Wow, deeply moving and purely awesome!

You moved Hempy with it, that is amazing.

Amithyst Stone wrote:

= / I thought this was the poetry section?

Yes, that is poetry Ami.

evefarrel wrote:

Amithyst Stone wrote:

= / I thought this was the poetry section?

Yes, that is poetry Ami.

yeah, even though it doesn't rhyme it still is poetry

nice job on the poem it's really good

The Dark Lord Happy Pantz wrote:

yeah, even though it doesn't rhyme it still is poetry

It rhymes! Every other line rhymes, and each stanza has a new rhyme pattern. That is my style. I also like telling stories in my poetry, like the one above.

And Ami, you've read the Raven by Poe, It follows nearly the same rhyme pattern mine does, so don't diss my work. I'd love to see you post something that moves Hempy, or touches the soul like only words with rythm and harmony can.

magician infinity wrote:

The Dark Lord Happy Pantz wrote:

yeah, even though it doesn't rhyme it still is poetry

It rhymes! Every other line rhymes, and each stanza has a new rhyme pattern. That is my style. I also like telling stories in my poetry, like the one above.

And Ami, you've read the Raven by Poe, It follows nearly the same rhyme pattern mine does, so don't diss my work. I'd love to see you post something that moves Hempy, or touches the soul like only words with rythm and harmony can.

hey music is words with rhythm and harmony. I can do that *sings off key*
though, I could probably write better.....

magician infinity wrote:

The Dark Lord Happy Pantz wrote:

yeah, even though it doesn't rhyme it still is poetry

And Ami, you've read the Raven by Poe, It follows nearly the same rhyme pattern mine does, so don't diss my work. I'd love to see you post something that moves Hempy, or touches the soul like only words with rythm and harmony can.

OH REEAAALY! Dissing someones work is annoying? WOW!!! And doing so when I have posted NONE OF MY OWN! That must be VEAAARY frustrating and unpleasant. An all without offering ANY constructive criticism on how it could possibly be improved! I cannot possibly imagine what that must be like for you, you poor poor little fucking baby. *glares toward the gaming ideas forum* SOMEBODY is a bit hypocritical now aren't they!

Here's the next poem I wrote. And before you ask, I did not write it for anyone in particular.

Fireflies

If dreams were fireflies,
You would be as bright as Time’s Square,
If dreams were fireflies,
The night sky would be as bright as day.
If dreams were fireflies,
The days would be brighter,
If dreams were fireflies,
Life would be more enjoyable,
If dreams were fireflies,
The grandest sights would be grander,
If dreams were fireflies,
We could watch greatness unfold in a jar,
If dreams were fireflies,
I wouldn’t need to dream,
If dreams were fireflies,
I’d be with you.


And Ami. I have played some of the greatest games of all time (and I do not number myst amongst them), and I believe that that game has some minor things that could be corrected. Also I did say, and I quote,

Quote :

Don't get me wrong, I would enjoy creating a race that would drive itself to extinction.

So don't go bitching at me!

good poem your really good at writing dude

O.K. Here is my next work.

Sorrow

In dark times, life shatters.
The heart that beats grows still.
Tear drops *pitter, patter*
Crying against his will.

What once was bright grows black.
Then the world fades to grey.
His life, luster it lacks.
Eyes won’t accept the day.

His soul is torn apart.
And despite all his might,
Even in deepest dark,
He still views a small light.

Here are the next 2. Enjoy.

Myself
Of kindness I know
Its seeds I do sow.
I am strong of mind,
Which is hard to find.
I know of Time's path
And of Nature's wrath.
I am odd, unique,
And my own critique.
Very few know me
And fewer still see
The path I have tread
Or those I have led.
I am a great friend.
I defy the trends.
I alone possess
My shadow's lone test.
I am who I wish
Whether poor or rich.
None can truly claim
My powerful flame
And when my ashes
Fall as time passes,
I can only pray
I don't fade away...

Sleepless...
I raise my head,
In the morning.
Leaving my bed,
No more soaring.
With eyes of dread,
The sun I view.
Clouds in my head,
The day I rue.
My dreams have fled.
Wish I could sleep.
My eyes rubbed red.
Dreams I can't keep.
Fall to my bed
To lie down flat.
Relax my head
And I know that
My dreams are dead...

magician infinity wrote:

Here are the next 2. Enjoy.

Sleepless...
I raise my head,
In the morning.
Leaving my bed,
No more soaring.
With eyes of dread,
The sun I view.
Clouds in my head,
The day I rue.
My dreams have fled.
Wish I could sleep.
My eyes rubbed red.
Dreams I can't keep.
Fall to my bed
To lie down flat.
Relax my head
And I know that
My dreams are dead...

is that supposed to be like that?
cuz in my mind i picture "snoring"
which makes more sense, i think

The Dark Lord Happy Pantz wrote:

magician infinity wrote:

Here are the next 2. Enjoy.

Sleepless...
I raise my head,
In the morning.
Leaving my bed,
No more soaring.
With eyes of dread,
The sun I view.
Clouds in my head,
The day I rue.
My dreams have fled.
Wish I could sleep.
My eyes rubbed red.
Dreams I can't keep.
Fall to my bed
To lie down flat.
Relax my head
And I know that
My dreams are dead...

is that supposed to be like that?
cuz in my mind i picture "snoring"
which makes more sense, i think

Yes, that was intentional

Here is the next of my works...

My Life
My life, has faded
To a shadow,
My life, has fallen
From the bright sun,
My life, is callin'
Me to come home,
My life, has prayed
For loss of pain,
My life, is afraid
That you will leave,
My life, is angry
That it cowers,
My life, is mangy
For loss of sleep,
My life, is restless
For lack of muse,
My life, is faceless
It doesn't sing,
My life, is power
For words hold strength,
My life, is wonder
Places I've been,
My life, is my life,
Who can claim it?

The next 2 are here.

End
Words, I must weave the words,
Must bend them to my will.
Around my mind they curl
Yet I haven’t had my fill.

Worlds, I seek to make worlds,
To define all that lives.
And the suns around which twirl
All of the life that I give.

Life, I want to end life,
To bring apocalypse.
And bring an end to the strife
That plagues our world, and end this…


Life After...
Deep within resides the pain
But it’s hold no longer reigns.
I live with it, like others,
My breath it will not smother.
I rise again; phoenix, flame;
I rise again; hold not pain.
Rage fills the holes in my heart
And terror fills all that’s dark.
Yet, I dare not harm a soul
While my friends I still can hold.

Man. You need to publish.

If I could find enough time to set these down into publishable copies, I might send them in. But as it is, I just can't do it.
That and this year has been an oddity. I normally have month-long spells of Writer's-Block. So for me to write so much in the span of a few months is miraculous, I surprise even myself.
And Shadows was the craziest challenge I've ever given myself. True, it's too damn long. But you try writing something that long, and keep the story flowing. I had to chop way to much of it to get it to fit the pattern I set for it. Maybe I'll dig up an old copy and post the stanzas I had to cut. Especially the one when Aaraaf and Israfel are in the desert and one of them cries over a dead child lying on the sands (oops, I just gave it away!).
And also, since summer is now here, I'm going to have a hard time in getting any new works posted. No internet at home, you know. So I may wind up with a few month's work setting on my flash-drive and laptop. If you see a new post with four or more works, don't worry.

oh we wont but we cant wait to read it so i might come by to read it and to.... hang out.heh your work is fabulous. i have the greatist hope that some day i might become as great a poet as you are.and thats the truth.

Moontyde, You already are a great poet. And that's no lie. Just because you don't write as much as fast as I do, doesn't mean that you're not good.

In fact, I used to have a small notebook with my work from (I think) the ninth grade. Back then, Blake Everitt edited my work for me (when it needed editing). I have no clue what happened to it though. Maybe a few of the teacher's still have the copies I gave them. I think there were about nine or ten of my works and one that Cameron Smith wrote. I've looked for it off and on over the last three years and still have not found it, so I gave up.
And then there are all the poems I wrote for special occasions and the few I wrote for specific people. Those I won't post here unless they give me permission and let me see the copies I gave them, as each of these is one of a kind.

The only problem I see with your work, Moontyde, is the frequent spelling errors. It's not really a problem, I can still understand your work (my cousin is slightly dyslexic (I don't think I spelled that right) and his handwriting is generally atrocious, so I can read quite a bit). What can help with that is a good spell check. Try running your poems through Microsoft Word or a program like that before posting them here, I do that and you'd probably be surprised at the number of spelling errors I make!

Just don't degrade your own work. That is every writer's major downfall. Someone (I can't remember who) once said that you are your own worst critic. In my case, that is undeniably true. When writing Shadows, I think I came within a centimeter of taking a sledgehammer to my computer, just because I reread my work and found a place or two where the lines just didn't fit or I was writing new stuff and couldn't find a word that fit into both the syllable pattern and the sentence (and I completely gave up on rhyming about a quarter of the way through!).

Keep these tips in mind and you'll be all set.

Here are my next two. The first is brand new. The second I wrote for my cousin when he first landed himself in the foster system.

Howling
I look to the moon at night.
I look upon its gleaming face.
And much like the wolves of centuries,
I howl.

Each night, I also can hear
The dogs nearby howl all their souls
To the brilliant, silver, gleaming moon.
They howl.

And as they howl, I can hear,
Within some deeply feral place,
The moon howl in return. And the moon,
It howls.

Yet, whenever I follow
In this amazing ritual,
The moon fails to reply. And only
I howl.

But I continue trying.
I keep up the futile attempts
Always hoping, always praying for
A howl.

Why must man be favored less
Than the Lupine beings we love
And respect? Why must man never hear
The Howl?

Why must my lone call remain
Unanswered on the night’s cold air?
And now the tears fall to the frost, and
I howl.



The Chain of Sins
Adding link by link,
The Chain of Sins,
Pain almost to the brink,
The Chain of Sins,
Getting heavier day by day,
The Chain of Sins,
Get rid of it, start to pray,
The Chain of Sins.
Do not fall to
The Chain of Sins,
Forge it into
The Sword of Faith.